Success; What Does It Truly Mean?

Sphere of Success©

I mentor people whenever possible because I was blest to be mentored; benefiting greatly due to their efforts.  My mentors all had one thing in common, they all believed in the same learning structure; “Keeping It Simple”!  That must be why, to this day, I like learning things that never change.  The Natural Laws, eternal truths, never ever change.  This is why I can say, without question, we live is a three-dimensional world.  It is a Law; it has to happen.

For every earthly species, these dimensions take on many common characteristics.  Consider our human person; it has a body, mind and a soul.  Thus, we live our life addressing every aspect presented to us on a physical, mental and spiritual level.  Our approach to these aspects will be made personally, professionally and spiritually. Yes, Mr. or Mrs. Sceptic, this applies to you too.  People have no say in this, we cannot discard or add to these personas and each of us must learn to accept, understand and thrive within the confines of these realities. It is only when we accomplish this task well, we are said to be at peace. Finding “balance” in our life, we will be generally viewed as someone who has their life “all together”.   Success!!

Many people strive for this nirvana their entire life and are never able to reach this place of “all togetherness”.  They are good, hardworking, educated and focused people but something still seems to get in the way.  This main hurtle is due to one major obstacle; we simply never truly learn, then profess and finally live the truth.  For example, we pick and choose when we will hide, disown or ignore one or more of our three personas.  We chose to be a different person at church than who we are at the office or on the golf course.  We rarely intentionally bring all three personas together as one.  In other words, we go through life denying to ourselves; who we really are in respect to one of more of our personas.  This denial causes us to live a lie.  A secret you might want to write down is that long term success can never be reached through falsehoods we convince ourselves to be true.  As my mom use to say, “The truth will always be revealed.”

These natural personas are not man-made; we were created with all three and we will die with all three.  Human kind cannot change these to suit our own desires; they are part of the natural laws that we have to live with.  As with all-natural laws, they are all true but not all people like the truth.  Some spend their life in a state of internal conflict fighting a battle that they cannot win.  During these skirmishes, three common strategies are used.  

The most common is when we try to compartmentalize the three personas. It goes something like this; “When we work; we work, when we play; we play and when we pray; we pray”.  Thanks to our crazy litigious society, human resource departments struggle with this model because it might satisfy the attorneys but, in reality, the natural truth will always be revealed.  Business culture tries to keep the three completely separate, appropriate and very tidy.  It is like “trying to satisfy a three-headed beast.”  This plan never works long term because one or more of the three will eventually cross the imaginary line; we were not wired to be only one persona at a time.  The unity of the three make us who we are.

The second most common plan is for the person to try to intentionally remove, extinguish or ignore one or more of their personas.  The deleted persona of choice is routinely their spiritual nature.  We live in a secular culture that promotes disagreeing, discrediting and disavowing spirituality so denying this persona makes you one of the cool kids.  Picture your body represented as our three triangle circle above; if you remove one of the triangles everyone can tell something is missing. 

The last arrangement is where we spend all of our time focusing on only one persona.  This is the technique we use in the attempt to “get ahead” in business.  We rationalize that we will spend all of our time, talents and treasures on our professional nature which will make us successful, then, once the business is up and running, we will have more time for family, friends and God.  All I can say is, good luck with that one. What generally happens in this scenario is when the business person finally gets around to doing the same for the other two personas, they find that the people whom are touched by those parts of their life are no longer there. 

The truth is, we cannot successfully separate and then balance the three personas; our nature does not work well in this fragmented way.  The winning formula is to use the truth completely and in unity for each persona.  We must be deliberate in doing the right things; this requires learning, professing and living the truth while striving to do our very best and always treat others how we would want to be treated.

The triangle that assures that we can do all of this with a pure mission is the hierarchy of Love.  Once again, we must do this in unity and without segregation of choice.  We are called to love our Creator, our neighbor and our self as one.   When I am spending time with my family and friends; I am also benefiting my work life by relaxing and the activities that I am doing should also be pleasing to my God.  When I am working I do so to benefit my family and my God.  When I am being spiritual it is to bring me to a closer relationship with my God, my spouse, my parents, siblings, friends, co-workers and supervisors.  Victory can only be obtained by our ability to combine the three personas into a single cohesive unit; one well-rounded successful trinity of a person.     

If this is my last post, I want all to know there was only one purpose for all that I have written; to have made a positive difference in the lives of others.

Anthony “Tony” Boquet, the author of “The Bloodline of Wisdom, The Awakening of a Modern Solutionary” and Vice President, Education and Development at The American College of Financial Services

Equality or Fairness; Which Do You Prefer?

We are born male or female, healthy or ill and our race or culture doesn’t matter at all.  At that special moment of our birth we are all equal in the eyes of our Creator, the world and our parents.  However, from that point on our values toward equality begins to change in the eyes of all who pay attention.  As we age we each begin to develop different talents, pursue different goals and strive for different aspirations.  It is because of these changes that we can never again be viewed, treated or even perceived as equal.

So, should we be treated equally?

Why would anyone seek to be treated as equal?

Instead, should we not strive for fairness?

It is through fairness that we show an individual respect earned for those differences that make each of us unique.  If gold was not an unique metal it would not be valued as precious.  This is why not all people will choose to limit themselves to the standards of those who wish to go through life doing just enough to skate by.  It is my belief that the majority are not satisfied with equality but rather demands, expects and wishes to receive fairness.

Speaking as a leader of various teams, I always strived to surround myself with people who wished to be better than all the rest.   Just think, if we applied the rules of equality to games, businesses or organizations then there would be no reason for competition.  If we were to treat every person as an equal to one another we would be working diligently at being mediocre.  The difference in being mediocre verses being outstanding is exactly what makes each of us unequal.

Picture the most spectacular painting you have ever saw; then ask yourself if you could have painted it.  If the answer is no, then you are not alone and you are definitely not an equal to the artist whose work you are admiring; nor should you be.  That difference is exactly what makes the work you’re admiring spectacular and I, for one, do not want to ever give up the spectacular for the mediocre.

So next time you hear of a school, business or organization’s leadership crying that we should not keep score, whining that everyone should be a winner or that everyone must be treated the same; think of that spectacular work of art, the gold medal athlete or the hardworking successful business owner who started their business with one hundred dollars and a dream. These remarkable people would not exist in the world of equality.  Instead, the world of art would be full of ugly painting because everyone would paint like the rest of us.  We would lose way more than we win because everyone would stop practicing too soon but worst of all we would all stop dreaming.

 It is for these reasons that I believe we were created equal to give us all a fair start but we are destined to be unequal and to accomplish extraordinary things through the use of our unique talents, skills and abilities.  By definition, nothing can be considered greater than without first surpassing equal and to make that leap all we need is a fair chance and the belief that we are special and unequal.

If this is my last post, I want all to know that there was only one purpose for all that I have written; to have made a positive difference in the lives of others.

The Wisdom of a Positive Self-Image

Have you ever gone somewhere with someone you did not particularly care for? They were not a bad person; they just were not a good fit to your personality. You may not have even realized why you felt the way you did about them.  Possibly the person was just not a lot of fun to be around, you might not have had much in common with them, or they just rubbed you the wrong way in general.

That kind of personal chemistry can make a one hour event feel like a week-long visit to a sadistic dentist.

It is sad but you just could not wait to be out of their presence for whatever the reason.

What if that person is you?

Have you ever considered that there is only one person that we have to be with every hour of every day and that person is our “self”? If our vision of that person is not good, life can be extremely rough and uncomfortable.  On the other hand, once we possess a positive self-image of our self we can reach heights that other can only dream of.  Those people have a healthy, honest and positive self-image.  This image also creates the mind set we use to form the basis of all of our decisions. Continue reading “The Wisdom of a Positive Self-Image”

Success; Guided by the Three Laws of Motion

“Truth is ever to be found in simplicity, and not in the multiplicity and confusion of things.”

Solutionary, Sir Isaac Newton

I have always been driven to “climb the ladder of success”.  I enjoy that metaphor the most because one of my mentors, Zig Ziglar, when speaking on the topic of the goal of success was fond of saying; “I will see you at the top.”   He was not the only one who commonly envisioned success as a state of being higher than the rest of the pack; a journey that called for the traveler to pay an extra price for getting to a place of distinction.  Anyone who ever climbed a mountain or even a hill can attest that the higher you climb the greater the toll, the harder work and the sweeter the victory.  Continue reading “Success; Guided by the Three Laws of Motion”